But seriously folks, here's a quick description of what we'll be seeing along the way during our road trip to St. Louis tonight and tomorrow:
Coming from Colorado, I-70 enters flat plains in Kansas. This portion of I-70 was the first segment to start being paved and to be completed in the interstate system. It is given the nickname "Main Street of Kansas" as the interstate extends from the Western border to the Eastern border covering 424 miles (682 km) and passing through most of the state's principal cities in the process.
In Topeka, I-70 intersects I-470, twice. At the eastern intersection, the Kansas Turnpike merges, making I-70 into a toll road. This is one of only two sections of I-70 that are tolled. (The other is part of the Pennsylvania Turnpike.) I-70 carries this designation from Topeka to Bonner Springs, the eastern terminus of the turnpike. There is also a third child route in Topeka, I-335, which runs from I-470 south to meet up with I-35 in the Flint Hills town of Emporia. Just past the Bonner Springs Toll Plaza I-70 crosses I-435 for the first time, which allows travelers to bypass the downtown traffic via I-435, which encircles the Kansas City metropolitan area. Further down the highway in Kansas City, Kansas, approximately 3 miles (4.8 km) before the 18th Street Expressway, I-70 is intersected again by another child route. This route, I-635, runs from I-35 at its southern terminus up to I-29, just about 5 miles (8.0 km) across the Missouri river, at its northern terminus. From I-635 to just past the 7th Street (US 169) exit, I-70 runs adjacent BNSF's Argentine Yard, one of the largest rail yards n the United States. Here I-670 (also designated "Alternate 70" on some signs) diverges, providing a more direct route that rejoins I-70 proper a few miles east in Missouri. The highway passes over the former stockyards and rail yard when it crosses the Kansas River on the Lewis & Clark Viaduct into downtown Kansas City, Missouri.
After crossing the Lewis & Clark Viaduct, I-70 enters Missouri. It encounters a loop of freeways, called the Alphabet Loop, which contains I-70 as well as I-35, I-670, U.S. 24, U.S. 40, U.S. 71, and U.S. 169. In the southern part of this loop, I-670 cuts directly through the downtown while I-70 bypasses the taller buildings a few blocks north near the Missouri River. Westbound I-670 is also designated Alternate I-70 making this the only permanent "alternate" interstate in the country. Most of the interstates in this loop are in their second mile, so all exits (no matter the which interstate carries the road) are numbered 2 and suffixed with every letter of the alphabet except I, O and Z.
The section of I-70 in Downtown Kansas City is approximately the southern city limits of "City of Kansas" when it was incorporated in 1853. The first two auto bridges in Missouri mark the city's original boundaries with the Broadway Bridge (Kansas City) (U.S. Route 169) being the west boundary while the Heart of America Bridge (Route 9) is the east boundary. Another intersection of note is the second traverse of I-435. This is primarily notable because it immediately precedes the Truman Sports Complex (home of both Arrowhead Stadium and Kauffman Stadium) and also because the entrance ramps from I-435 northbound onto I-70 eastbound also serve as the exit ramps from I-70 into the Truman Sports Complex parking lots. This section of the Interstate is marked as the "George Brett Super Highway", named after the Kansas City Royals third baseman who played the entirety of his career (1977-1993) at "The K". The last interstate intersection in the immediate Kansas City metro area is with I-470 in Independence.
After passing Kansas City, I-70 traverses the length of Missouri, west to east. It passes through the largest city between Kansas City and St. Louis, Columbia, which is about halfway between the two major cities, and the home of the University of Missouri. The terrain is rolling with some hills and bluffs near rivers. I-70 also crosses the Missouri River twice (as did the original US 40)--at Rocheport, about 15 miles (24 km) west of Columbia, and at St. Charles, about 20 miles (32 km) northwest of St. Louis. Most of the highway on this stretch is four-lane. Various proposals have been made to widen it (at an estimated cost of $3.5 billion) including turning it into a toll road. I-70 eventually gets into the St. Louis metro area and U.S. Route 40 splits to the south, along with U.S. Route 61, which does not have a concurrency with I-70. The intersecting road will be upgraded to Interstate standards because of the upgrade to Interstate 64. After this interchange, I-70 intersects two child routes, I-270 and I-170. I-70 then heads into the city limits of St. Louis, designated "The Mark McGwire Highway" after the Cardinals former first baseman (1997-2001), who hit 70 home runs in 1998 to break the single season record set by Roger Maris in 1961, allowing the number 70 to take on greater significance in St. Louis. It continues south to intersect with I-64, U.S. 40, and I-55, which then become concurrent as they head east to cross the Mississippi River on the Poplar Street Bridge.